Monday, September 22, 2008

Good Morning!!! or Your first 5 minutes....


Do not think before you answer this question

What was your first thought this morning…..?

 

     Did you open your eyes and say to yourself “Already?! I JUST went to bed (or it feels like it) can’t I just stay in bed till….well until…where’s the snooze button?” or “I have SO much to do today. Get out of this bed!  I have to get up and start doing, doing, doing!” or possibly your sleepy self said “How much longer am I going to have to go to this job?  Why don’t I just leave? I’m so done with the people in that office! Why can’t I ever get ahead?  I am always working, working,, working!”

 

     Or……..you woke up very naturally a few minutes before you had to get out of bed and your first thought was something like, “MMMM I love my bed…it feels soo good.  I feel so safe in this bed. I am so glad that I am using that blanket that my Mom gave me.  It feels so soft on my body.  I feel well rested and ready to enjoy others company today.  I wanna have fun today.  Actually, today is going to be a great day.”

 

    More than likely, what you said to yourself was probably somewhere in between these two extremes.  Well actually that is if you even remember what your thoughts were or were you on auto pilot….hmmmm I digress.  If we are honest with ourselves we have all felt a little of all of these reactions if not the exact same ones.  We all have good mornings and bad mornings. The more important aspect of the morning is how we deal with it.

 

   The morning is like a new start every day if you look at it that way. It is the time of day that in many ways is the most sacred if you let it be. I posit to you that if you make a conscious decision to make the first few minutes in the morning your most deliberate and intentional time of your day, you will begin to create a vastly different life for yourself.

 

   If you are feeling like your life is having a life of its own and you are just along for the ride, try changing or just being aware of the first 5 minutes of your day.

 

  When we begin to calm or focus our spinning minds and thoughts first thing in the morning and direct them to feeling good things i.e.;”I love my bed…. I’m so happy that I was able to have that dinner with my good friends last night...  I’m so happy that I put that picture I love on the wall so I can see it as soon as I wake up...  I so much appreciate my mate sleeping next to me.” Etc… You set the mood for the day.  You have awoken into the world with a purpose to feel good and that is what will happen if you focus differently. Our focus and therefore our experience of our lives begins to change in subtle and not so subtle ways. 

 

   Just think about it.  On the days when you jump out of bed because you are paranoid that you will be late for work or on the other hand when you purposely stay in bed to avoid work, it’s on those days I can bet you were probably not at your best and even if you did accomplish some tasks, you probably didn’t feel particularly good. Am I right?  Well, I know that I am right because I have been through it too!

 

    There have been many a day when I have jumped out of bed in the exact manner that I just explained and gone the whole day crazy unconscious just to make sure that everything got done and before I know it, it’s time to sleep and start the vicious cycle all over again.   But there have also been days where I would start out the same frantic way, get on the subway (with all the other frantics!) and realizing how frantic I really was, I would have suddenly stopped, sometimes literally physically stopped, took a breathe and realized I could make another choice in that moment.  I could stay on that frantic roller coaster all day, or I could get a refund for my ticket and buy myself some calm, good conscious feelings.  It was my choice. I could take a breath. The power of CHOICE, the greatest power we have…

 

   If I had let myself get that far into my day and was able to notice my craziness I did  my best I could to make another choice.  It’s like that old commercial where the actor hits himself on the forehead and says “I could have had a V8!!!”  I remember in that commercial and say “I forgot I could make another Choice!!”   Then I would readjust and begin to focus on all the good that surrounded me in the moment (like the ability to make another choice!) and the good that will be happening during the rest of that day.  In this way I have been able to circumvent a frantic spiral of crazy unconscious thoughts and emotions and realign with a positive path for my day.

 

  I relay this example first of all because I think that it is very common as far as the crazy unconscious ways many of us walk through life, but more importantly to help you see how much easier it is if you have your “V8” moment in the security of your warm beautiful and safe bed.  If we start to make our choices to have a good feelings and a fun day from that tender and powerful time right when we wake up, it is vastly easier and in the end will help us create a life full of good feelings and a sense of freedom of where we choose to focus the experience of our lives.

 

   So my challenge to you is tomorrow, not to jump out of bed, but stay in bed for at least 5 minutes and notice all the things that you can feel good about.  If it feels right tomorrow, try it again the next day.  Who knows it may become a habit and you may actually mean it when you say “Good Morning!”

 

 

 

Friday, August 1, 2008

Impatience or Divine Anticipation?








Recently one of my coaching clients and I were speaking of impatience and what a feeling of impatience can do us as we go about living our lives...

Having a constant sense of impatience for something to happen in our lives is very common and in many ways quite natural. We all strive to see what the future will bring and that is not necessarily a bad thing, but in our desire to speed up the natural flow it can actually keep us stuck.

Whether it be wanting a relationship that we dream of to be here now or if it is needing a resolution to a problem, the feeling of impatience actually halts the natural process of growth. Impatience keeps us from living totally in the Now of life and from being in touch with our authentic selves and moment by moment impulses.

If we are constantly putting our focus on something in the future, we will inevitably fail to see, feel and react to what is right in front of us. And many times it is the things that are right in front of us that will help us deal with or solve the problems we are being impatient about.
In general, impatience comes from our need to control the outcome or resolution of a certain situation. We may want a person to do what we want them to do. We may want a scenario in our lives to go the way in which we want them to go. Whatever it may be it is a form of control and not flow.

When we have flow in our lives it is not as if we don't look forward to events and situations. We do but without a sense of trying to figure it out and more importantly trying to get the result that we think is the best.

When we begin to let go of results and stay in the flow of moment by moment living, a beautiful thing begins to happen. Instead of impatience, a sense of what I call, divine anticipation begins to manifest in our lives. The more we are in tune with our thoughts, feelings and actions of the present NOW, the more impatience begins to diminish.

The best way to describe divine anticipation is what we have as children at Christmas time. Remember that feeling when you were so excited about Christmas morning? You couldn't wait for it to come and you knew it would.
Divine anticipation is the positive result of letting go of impatience. Divine anticipation is the thrilling sense that something is coming. You may not know specifically what it is that's
coming, but you know it is! It is always exciting, positive and gives you energy.

On a practical level, when I begin to be aware of myself become impatient over anything (the key word there is aware), I will try and take those feelings of anxiety, fear and trepidation for the outcome and redirect the strong energy that is coming from the impatience toward creating something positive in the present moment. For instance I may go for a run and align myself with all that is working so beautifully in the NOW. Or one of my favorite ways to redirect that energy is to do something for another person like to write a friend a note saying how much I appreciate them in my life.

Whatever may work for you to take the inpatient energy of future results and shift it ever so slightly into energy for the present moment, over time you will begin to have unexpected and joyous waves of the Divine Anticipation.

Have a Beautifully fulfilling NOW.......



Wednesday, July 9, 2008

#3 View from a Pier




Today on my run as soon as I go to the pier on the Hudson River(see pic left) almost as if on cue, my iPod played one of my favorite beautiful songs Mieux qu'ici-bas by my favorite singer Isabelle Boulay (see pic right!)

This song is so stirring and moving. Standing on the pier and looking back at the city brought me so beautifully into the present moment. Watch her sing it here ; http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V0sjOK_lyz8

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Oh Mary!

Today I went for a run. As a runner, some days you really need a run. Today was one of those days. I just needed the inspiration of getting my blood pumping and clear my head so I could feel deeper.
So even though the humidity in NYC was almost unbearable this morn, I decided to run outside instead of the gym for some crazy reason. I am learning little by little to not question the "crazy reasons"... so I ran to the Hudson river.
Although it was not a long run I was very glad that I was outside in the open air instead of the treadmill (BTW I have nothing against the treadmill!)
When I run there is a little bit of "get to the end" feeling because I love that release when I can just let go and feel and listen when I am done. That time after the run is in many ways the most precious time for me.
Recently that time has been spent at a local Catholic church called Holy Family, which ironically was the name of the catholic school I went to from 1st to 4th grade. In this church is one of the sweetest alters to the Virgin Mary. She is so serene and welcoming. And even better most of the time there is no one in the church.
I sit alone in this all but forgotten church sweaty from the humidity and from my run and let go and feel my feelings whatever they may be. Mary quitely looks over me while I allow myself to just be. Sometimes my eyes are open and other times they are closed, but whenever I look up she is there with that sweet open expression that has comforted thousands upon thousands of New Yorkers over the years. She is truly a beauty.

Monday, July 7, 2008

Beauty Detective Journal Entry #1 Head & Shoulders


Today I begin my public Beauty Detective Journal.
It is my hope that with these reflections, others will be inspired in some way to begin to see all the beautiful things, events and moments that are already happening in their own lives as well.

#1
Today as I walked my best friend Terri to the train I held my dog Dexter against my chest. He was positioned in such a way that his little head rested perfectly on my shoulder. As he rested his body against mine I could feel his little heart beat. That in itself was a beautiful connection, but just as I thought that, I was aware of my heart right under his and for a few beats they were in sync with each other.This was such a special feeling and even more special because Dexter has heart disease and in that moment it felt perfect and strong.

Monday, June 9, 2008

Charity Day August 2nd



Since I have been doing the charity days you have helped raise over $1000 for charities such as
  • Habitat for Humanity
  • Princess Diana Memorial Fund
  • Go Red for Women
  • NRDC
On Sat, August 2nd we will do it again!! 50% of all sales that day will go to
KIVA.org
Kiva's mission is to connect people through lending for the sake of alleviating poverty.
Kiva is the world's first person-to-person micro-lending website, empowering individuals to lend directly to unique entrepreneurs in the developing world.

To learn more check out their website here
www.KIVA.org
Kiva
To make an appointment for the charity day please

Call 917.328.9991

Look forward to us working together to give even more to help others!!!